What to do if your body fails you during pregnancy and birth?

I’ve heard this a couple of times recently – so I jumped on livestream to talk about it! You can watch or read below.


This has come up a few times recently so I thought I’d address it here.

nd it’s been about your body letting you down in pregnancy and birth.

When people talk about hypnobirthing it gets a bad rap because people think all we want are natural perfect births and I think that the way we teach it at The Calm Birth School nothing could be further from the truth. For me it’s all about creating positive experiences however your baby comes into the world

Alongside that one of my face affirmation is “understand the things you can control and let go of the things you can’t”

That is the best preparation for becoming a parent that you could possibly ever get

It’s something I have always thought but I do feel like it’s being thrust in my face at the moment! Obviously we have Aluna,she is our 3rd and last child, so in my mind I keep thinking “this is the last time to get it right“ and I don’t want to f*ck it up.

Then I have my older kids who are 3 and 5, and because of their ages they are pushing every, single button, as they try to stretch their boundaries and find out who they are and try and see where their limits are. And it absolutely drives me insane when all I want is a quiet life.

So I am in this push and pull of trying to micromanage the situation and contain it and keeping calm and cool and let the unimportant things go.

This lesson starts when we fall pregnant, when our babies in our womb. I believe we are not here to teach our children, they are here to teach us.

Coco was a rainbow baby. Some people who have had miscarriages or have had difficulty in conceiving or carrying babies feel like their bodies have let them down and they don’t know why it hasn’t worked.

When I look back at our loss I feel like it was there to teach me, for one thing, how to connect to my husband again, when we shared the things that were our deepest fears and concerns.
I believe we lost that baby because we were supposed to not take things for granted so much. We were supposed to really really cherish the beauty of the next pregnancy even more than if we hadn’t had that experience.

It’s about looking at the bigger picture. One of the ladies who talked about this issue, had a beautiful water birth and was then rushed to hospital due to a post-partum haemorrhage. She says it really colours how she now teaches and talks about birth, so perhaps the lesson there was that she needed to broaden the way she looks at birth and broaden the way she teaches.

Other ladies were talking about feeling let down because their babies are presenting as breech. And whilst they have lots of time to help baby turn, I asked them to look at the bigger picture.

There may be a really good reason their babies are presenting breech. Perhaps they aren’t supposed to have a vaginal birth or perhaps they are supposed to have a breech vaginal birth or maybe this is something they have to learn to accept that they can’t nas a lesson for coming parenthood.

We become very judgemental of either the environment or ourselves when things don’t go to plan so I would invite you to really suspend judgement when the body doesn’t act in the way you anticipated and ask yourself, what can I take from this to apply for the rest of my pregnancy or in future pregnancies or in life!

Our children teach us from the moment we are aware we have conceived. So be generous to your body even when it doesn’t act the way we anticipate it should do, Ask yourself “what is the lesson in this?”

I think this is a really great way to approach life pregnancy and birth. I hope you’ve found it useful, if you have any questions please let me know.

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